Underground, overground, Wombling free

It didn't take long for Boris Johnson to get stuck in to his new job, firing the two most senior staffers in the mayor's office and making a commitment to ban the drinking of alcohol on the Underground.

Why stop at alcohol? Why not ban the eating of burgers while we're at it. There are few more obnoxious sights than watching - even worse, smelling - someone tucking in to a Big Mac on the tube.

A news item in yesterday's Daily Telegraph said he had been meeting with an old friend, Lord Brocket who has a "few ideas" of his own for running London.

Brocket, you may recall, is an ex-con who was incarcerated for a spell at Her Majesty's pleasure after he buried some of his classic car collection on the country estate while fraudulently claiming on his insurance policies. My guess is that this honorary Womble has a grand plan for London's traffic. He wants to bury it.